My soul clings to you,Your right hand upholds me.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes it and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.”
Husbands, I think we often respond in our flesh in trying to “fix” our wives or even to be more spiritual “to make them more godly”. God has commanded us to sanctify our wives through loving her, giving up ourselves for her, and gently washing her with the word. Husbands, this is a romantic picture of love. Imagine the physical picture of this and do this with your words, emotions, and actions toward your wife. There is nothing more romantic. This love is not weak; our love is to come from the strength of Christ. We are to nourish and wash her with the word and truth. We are to love as men and are to shepherd our family towards Christ. It is a love that has amazing strength and integrity to it but is also full of tenderness. We are to live with her in an understanding way learning how to cherish and nourish her. Our words and actions should build her up, not tear her down. And just as Christ’s love is effectual in sanctifying our hearts, our love through Christ will be effectual in changing our wives. God says that an ungodly man can be changed by a godly wife’s respect (1 Peter 3). An ungodly wife can be changed by the love of her husband. So, whether or not she is godly or not, we are free to passionately love her, knowing that our love is effectual.
Husbands, when we act in our flesh to “fix” our wives, we are responding just as bad as the nagging wife. We are in sin. We must also be careful; we are to wash our wife gently with the word, not our desires. And we are to do this in an understanding way that honors her. In fact, the scripture says that if we respond with our flesh, God will not hear our prayers. “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”
So, men, walk in freedom and extravagantly love your wives.
